|This butter don't fly....|
We take you to Japan where the wedding party of Lieutenant B. F. Pinkerton awaits the entrance of his bride:
There! Coming up the hill! It is the gentle voice of my delicate little geisha, Madama Buttercup!
You must not toy with her affections, you heartless naval officer, you.
BUTTERCUP: (entering, accompanied by an entourage of Japanese women)
Cor, somebody get me a bloody chair, my feet are fair killin' me.
Was the climb difficult?
Who's idea was it to marry on top of a blinkin' mountain? What's wrong with a proper church and a proper parson?
"Miss Buttercup" - your name suits you to perfection.
So I'm plump, am I? Go ahead and say it; I'm not ashamed of my body. Men like me this way.
PINKERTON (to Sharpless)
She's a flower! Her exotic fragrance has intoxicated me.
That's the tobacky, darlin'. I've got pipe tobacky and snuff, both on sale this week.
How old are you?
HA! That's comical, that is. Back in my baby-farming days I used to nurse this handsome lieutenant here.
Wait... what? Ew. (Suddenly the party is interrupted by the entrance of The Bonze, an angry Buddhist priest.)
Buttercup! Buttercup! Abomination! You have renounced our ancient faith! WE RENOUNCE YOU!
What's wrong with the good old Church of England, I'd like to know? Simmer down, or I'll have the Archbishop give you a good talking to. Here - I'll give you a good price on these lovely peppermint drops. I don't care if you're Buddhist or Hindu or a bloomin' agnostic - everyone enjoys a lovely peppermint drop.
But - we renounce you!!!
How about some jacky? It's excellent.
Got any treacle?
What about toffee - got any toffee?
Step over here where we can talk business, gentlemen. (As the men start bartering over Buttercup's goods, everyone gradually forgets about the wedding and wanders off. Curtain.)
When asked to comment, Cio-Cio San was quoted as saying, "This was a bad idea. I'm going back to bed."