October 22, 2012

Messing around with opera singers' names

Elizabeth Bishop-Check's favorite game.
I've become very adept at working by doing nothing constructive whatsoever; that's sort of the beauty of having a blog. Take today's post, for example: it's the result of several minutes of staring at artist rosters of various opera companies and playing around with some of the names that caught my eye.  I made a little list of really cool names which you get if you combine two names, as if the two people either got married or one adopted the other.

I now share these with you. Wow - it's your lucky day!! And here we go. Again: the premise is that the two people are either married or related, right? Okay then.

Ryan Speedo Green (Met bass-baritone) 

Michael Forest (Met tenor) = Ryan S. Green Forest 
(See how it works? This is fun, right?)

Jennifer Check (Met soprano)
Elizabeth Bishop (Met mezzo) = Elizabeth Bishop Check 
(For the chess players amongst you)

Kathryn Day (Met mezzo)
Christopher Job (Met bass) = Kathryn Day Job 
(No matter how beautifully she sings, everyone would still tell her to "keep her day job"...)

Richard Paul Fink (Met bass-baritone)
Emily Newton (Met soprano) = Richard Fink Newton 
(New cookie from Nabisco)

Lucy Crowe (Met soprano)
Krysty Swann (Met mezzo) = Lucy Crowe Swann 
(I searched in vain for an artist named "Lucy Ugly Duckling")

Matthew Rose (Met tenor)
Jake Gardner (San Fransico Opera bass) = Matthew Rose Gardner
(Very thorny relationship there. Har har har)

Stuart Skelton (Met tenor) 
Brian Mulligan (S.F. O. bass) = "Mulligan Stu" 
(This could be his new nickname... or not...)

Deborah Humble (Hamburg Opera mezzo)
Amber Wagner (Frankfort Opera soprano) = Deborah Humble Wagner
(And there we would have a highly ironic oxymoron...)

Ain Anger (Hamburg Opera bass)
Kelly God (Hannover Staatsopera soprano) = Ain Anger God
(Quick! Sacrifice a virgin!!)

Anne-Carolyn Bird (Met soprano)
John Holiday (Met counter-tenor) = Anne-Carolyn Bird Holiday
(a.k.a. "Turkey Day", a.k.a. Thanksgiving)

Eve Gigliotti (Met soprano)
Stefan Adam (Hannover Staatsoper tenor) = Eve Adam
(If they had a baby, they could name it "Apple", like Gwyneth Paltrow's child...)

Young Kwon (Hannover bass)
Nathan Gunn (Met baritone) = Young Gunn
(Wanted: Dead or Alive!)

Okay, that's probably enough. I should do something constructive, right? I guess I'll go do some laundry or something...  By the way, there are LOTS more of these I could have included, but they were all kind of X-rated, and I'm far too classy to stoop so low. Plus, I don't wanna get fired; there's that also.

My book THE OPERA ZOO: SINGERS, COMPOSERS AND OTHER PRIMATES is available from Kendall Hunt Publishing. Order online or by phone from customer service: 1-800-344-9034, ext. 3020.

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